“I wanna free fall out into nothing
Gonna leave this world for awhile
And I’m free, I’m free falling”
There is something about a free fall. The letting go of all fears and just letting go of yourself really. I distinctly remember this being the only adventure sport that really made me want to quit last minute. In the freezing Queenstown, NZ, where every gust of wind was sending chills down your spine, standing on this rope bridge dangling over this threatening stream.. Well just gave me a frozen spine. Ironically I felt spineless! I wanted to not let my ego get the better of me and just admit to myself that I couldn’t do it. I guess somewhere though I know I owed to a promise I had made to myself long back. I would try everything in life once specially when it came to adventure and adrenaline.
“When you want something in life, you just gotta reach out and grab it.” This is one of my fave quotes from one of my fave movies- Into the wild. Which by the way is on my list. To pull of the stunt he did in the movie. Just go into the wild. Maybe someday I will. And I also know how important it is in life not necessarily to be strong but to feel strong. To measure yourself at least once. To find yourself at least once in the most ancient of human conditions. Facing the blind death stone alone, with nothing to help you but your hands and your own head.
I always used to feel life is about jumping, taking that leap of faith, letting go, being, knowing that someone out there is going to get your back.. so go for it! I couldn’t not jump. I remember walking up to this guy (who was really undeniably unbelievably attractive) and had been curiously staring at me for awhile wondering if I would go through with it. I asked him bluntly if he would jump with me. He was shocked out of his wits and his expression told me he thought I was interesting nut case. He then grinned impishly at me telling me he would but then he would have to hold me real tight. I told him that was exactly why I had asked him.
After we were literally tied together he asked me to shut my eyes and trust him. He took the leap of faith for both of us that I couldn’t muster the courage to. He made us free fall.. along a waterfall swaying in the sky with the water below teasing us.. The adrenaline rush coupled with a sense of peace and calm yet topped with a sense of achievement and pride.. We were smiling dizzily at each other with our eyes locked knowing that we wouldn’t ever forget we did this together.. I haven’t.. I know he hasn’t..
Thank you stranger from my not so long back interesting past. If I ever meet you again and we do recognize each other, I owe you one.
P.S. But now am I free fallin? Guess not. I want to though. Maybe I will.